The Rise & Grind Blog, From Pure Grind Coffee

Coffee Snob Thomas Jelneck Coffee Snob Thomas Jelneck

The Subtle Art OF True Coffee Snobbery

Welcome to Pure Grind Coffee, where we believe that being a coffee snob is more than just a preference – it's an elite status. If you're a coffee lover, you know that there's nothing quite like the taste of a perfectly brewed cup of coffee. But for coffee snobs, it's not just about the taste – it's about the entire coffee experience and from the second that you open a freshly roasted bag of Pure Grind, to the grind itself, to the AMAZING aroma, and then, that first blissful first sip, Pure Grind Coffee will quickly become your most favorite coffee on the planet.

First of all, let's clear up any misconceptions about what it means to be a coffee snob. Contrary to popular belief, being a coffee snob isn't about being pretentious or judgmental towards others, BUT, You do you, judge away if you want to, be pretentious as hell if it floats your boat. It's simply a way of appreciating the nuances and complexities of coffee. Coffee snobs take their coffee VERY seriously, and they're willing to go to great lengths to get the best cup possible.

Freshly Roasted Whole Beans Of Bliss

So why is being a coffee snob elite? For one, it means that you have a refined palate. You can taste the subtle differences between beans from different regions and appreciate the unique characteristics of each roast. This level of discernment is not something that everyone possesses, and it sets coffee snobs apart as true connoisseurs. You’re also a badass. Celebrate that shit.

Being a coffee snob is more than just having a refined palate. It's also about the dedication to the craft of coffee. Coffee snobs are passionate about the entire process, from selecting the beans to brewing the perfect cup. They're willing to invest in high-quality equipment, like burr grinders and pour-over drippers, to ensure that their coffee is brewed to perfection.

In addition, being a coffee snob means that you're part of a community of like-minded badass individuals. Coffee snobs share their knowledge and passion with others, whether it's through recommending a new roast or sharing brewing tips. It's a community that values quality over quantity and appreciates the art of coffee.

So if you're a coffee lover who's ready to take your passion to the next level, it's time to embrace your inner coffee snob. Invest in high-quality beans, equipment, and accessories, and take the time to appreciate the subtleties of each cup, because, life is too freaking short. Join the community of coffee snobs who are dedicated to the craft and are always on the hunt for the perfect cup. Because when it comes to coffee, being a snob is not a bad thing – it's something you gotta celebrate EVERY DAMNED DAY.

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Coffee Snob Thomas Jelneck Coffee Snob Thomas Jelneck

Coffee Snob Tip: Skip the Long Lines, Buy Pure Grind

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It’s 6:45 in the morning, and you’re on your way to a meeting. From the jackass in traffic to your annoying-as-hell client, the Apple Watch on your wrist is buzzing with bullshit you can’t even deal with yet. You’re shaking; you haven’t even had your coffee yet — the sweet soul of your existence — so you’re cranky as hell. On your drive, you spot a big sign for a corporate coffee joint in a shopping plaza. It’s the only one you see around and your GPS says it’ll be miles before you come across another. So, you make the ultimate sacrifice and walk into the marketplace of doom.

What the Actual Hell…

This place looks like it was furnished by a big corp store that makes its generic-looking products in a sweatshop. You prefer the sustainable local shop with pallet table tops, industrial light fixtures, and exposed ceiling pipes. With the minimalist furniture and decor — the way you like it, sitting beside the people who get you. At this trash shop, these people don’t even recycle, man. It’s not your first choice, but it’ll do; you need your fix.

It’s Packed.

Everyone and their freaking mother is there. The line is out of the door, but dammit, you need your fix. The woman in front of you is wearing workout leggings and a shirt that says some spiritual yoga mantra. “20 triple macchiato, make it skinny, decaf, no dairy, no soy, no sugar, no fat,” she tells the bustling barista behind the counter who is quickly trying to note all of this customer’s insane requests. Hurry the F up. Nama-stay out of my way. You’re about to lose your shit now and flip these mass-produced, commercialized tables over.

Finally.

Finally, the time has come; Matcha Mocha Triple DeCaf mom is out of your way and your order comes up. Simple, yet beautifully black. No milk-washed foolishness topped with whipped cream and caramel, mocha, cinnamon sugary-ass drizzles. Pure, dark, and rich. Or so you thought. This stuff is vile. It tastes like charred black water in a damn cup. After tossing that crap in the grass, you make your escape. You’ve have made it out of this hellhole completely unfulfilled.

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You’re Too Good For This Nonsense.

You don’t want to put up with this crap. Well, what if we told you that you could skip the long lines with the matcha-drinking yoga moms holding up the line and slowing you down? Ditch that burnt mud. We recommend you become a master barista right in your own dang home. No line, no waiting, no filters, no GMOs, no-nonsense. Just bold, bitchin’ beans, a grinder, and a French Press — delivered right to your door. Snag it all in our deluxe Coffee Snob Kit.

Welcome To The Club.

Welcome to the best damn club you’ll ever be in. You’re a snob, a purist, an elitist. Accept it — Own It! Now you’re one of us and we couldn’t be prouder. Grind those badass beans, brew that bad boy, take that first sip of pure black magic. Imagine… pouring that steaming hot deliciousness into your tumbler. The angels are singing. The Heavens are rejoicing. Now, you can drive past that cringy cult-like shop beaming with pride knowing you’re not subjecting yourself to that pure and diabolical sludge torture EVER again. You’re a Pure Grind coffee snob, and that’s the way we like it.


Grab The Kit And Be ONE Of Us.

 
Pure Grind Coffee Snob Deluxe Kit
$98.50

The Pure Grind Coffee Snob Deluxe Kit comes with everything you need to pursue the coffee snobbery arts. 3 16oz. bags of freshly roasted Pure Grind whole beans, 1 French Press, and 1 coffee grinder. You’ll NEVER drink coffee the same, because, you shouldn’t anyway.

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